Toni Rotunda Frye, Baker is the heart of the Tri Delta house at the University of Texas in Austin, where her adorable schnauzer, Harper, has become a beloved fixture, even earning a spot on the composite picture. Toni, affectionately known as Mama T, has been a house director for 13 years, with 12 of those dedicated to Tri Delta at various locations like Tennessee, Florida State and now UT. Originally from Kansas City, Toni brings a wealth of experience, having spent her earlier career in operations management for Hallmark Cards. Toni is the proud mom of three adult kids, including a Delta Zeta daughter who attended the University of Florida.
Why did you become a house director and why Tri Delta?
“After spending 30 years in the corporate world, I found myself at a crossroads when they suggested my retirement! Taking a year to reinvent myself, the inspiration struck when my daughter’s house mom, who was truly special, passed away from cancer. Witnessing her impact, I thought, ‘This could be my next job.’ When that realization hit me, I began exploring opportunities. I discovered Sororitymoms.com, submitted my resume, and received an email from another Greek organization. However, there was a catch—they wouldn’t allow me to bring my dog! Soon after, I made the move to Florida State without even seeing the house beforehand because I was able to bring my dog!”
How do you find work-life balance?
“I have my designated chair—a big, comfy spot where I unwind with my Kindle and music, ready to assist if needed. Harper, my dog, and I are walkers, covering 3.5 to 5 miles daily. The fresh air is my sanity check and keeps me feeling refreshed. I enjoy spending time with fellow house directors, often hitting a happy hour. I’m always available by text and make sure I’m connected while still maintaining some independence that is essential for work-life balance. Everyone deserves their version of balance!”
What do you love about being a house director?
“I love telling and sharing old stories of being a Tri Delta and connecting with the women. It’s fulfilling to develop relationships with vendors, too. I believe in the saying ‘You catch more flies with honey than vinegar’ and I love relationship building and I am always friendly with everyone. I have what I call 5 minutes with Mama T during the new member class meetings. Women love listening to what it was like when I was a collegian in the sorority! Decorating is not my thing, but I do plan each of the in-house women their favorite requested birthday meals. And again, this year, I did my annual Valentine’s Day Love Sucks prime rib dinner with balloons, candy and PJs for those without plans. Everyone wanted to come and the women with dates were bummed that they had made other plans!”
What does a typical week look like for you?
“Our local chapter has private chefs, and a typical week involves planning menus and ordering food for Monday and Thursday deliveries. I handle tasks like signing in guests, coordinating events, overseeing maintenance, conducting interior and exterior walkthroughs, and ensuring the overall smooth operation of the house and prioritizing safety for the women. I always have my phone handy with the Notes app open to capture things I find during my inspections! It’s difficult to capture a typical day! No one day is the same. You wake up and you think one thing but it changes direction! It’s a role that keeps you on your toes, and there’s never a dull moment.”
How has being a house director contributed to your growth and development personally and professionally?
“I always considered myself laid back and patient, and working with young adults further reinforced this. I’ve grown to understand what matters to them and how to communicate effectively. Growth has come from figuring out the right way to phrase things.
“I love stepping in to fix things, improve processes and do things more efficiently which resulted in saving $12k a month in operating expenses is just one example. Whether it’s operations, finances, budgets or vendor contracts, I enjoy looking at things and finding ways to make them better! It’s about making improvements and embracing challenges. I implement what I learned in the corporate world about immediate praise and acknowledgment – not just saying, ‘You did great,’ but being specific in praise. The key is to never stop making someone feel good.”
Do you have any advice for someone considering becoming a house director?
“It’s not really a job. It’s a lifestyle. You are living this job. When you first get in this position, sit back a semester and watch before jumping in to make changes. Look for the low-hanging fruit for ways to improve efficiency and processes with things like recycling and trash frequency, for example. Even these small things can make a big impact. If you love a challenge, are ok with having a schedule that changes daily, enjoy building relationships and working with women of this age group, it may be a great fit.”
If you are interested in learning more about our house director careers, we encourage you to visit the Tri Delta Housing Career Page,Tri Delta Housing Job Board or email hr@trideltaeo.org for more information.